People always say that age is just a number, and I’m beginning to think the same applies to weight. As of this morning I am officially down to my pre-pregnancy weight. Before I found out I was pregnant I was counting calories and exercising a decent amount, I was happy with where I was. This morning after I weighed myself, I looked in the mirror and saw the deflated balloon that my stomach has become, stretch marks and my lingering linea negra and I wasn’t happy with what I saw. How can I be the same weight but have a completely different body? I love being a mom and I love that my body was able to change in order to carry and birth my son but I want everything to go back. How I look has always been a major part of my identity in the past and now instead of my cute summer clothes that show off my figure, I’m trying to find flowy long shirts to cover up the remaining stomach pooch so I don’t look a few months pregnant.
Lately, I’ve been going to yoga and some Barre classes to try and get in shape and at a class a few weeks ago the instructor asked if anyone was pregnant and then pushed again looking straight at me. When everyone said once again no she proceeded to begin to list out cautions one should take if they are pregnant all the while looking at me. It was a major blow to my little ego and I’ve been trying to recover ever since.
Weight is just a number and mine says that my body should look a lot different than it does.